Dumb Things Couples Do
Here’s a list of some of the dumb things couples do, and more importantly, what to do instead.
Going It Alone – Most couples live busy lives isolated from other couples. The result is a severe loss of perspective. When problems come along, as they will, a little thing can be seen as a big thing, and quickly spiral out of control.
When you go it alone, there is also no one there to support, encourage and pick you up as a couple.
What to do instead: Make is a priority to have couple friends. It’s really great to have couple friends who are older, been married longer, and have the wisdom of perspective.
Arguing to win – It’s so normal to have disagreements. I’m not sure I trust the folks who say they never disagree.
The problem comes when couples get caught up in arguing to be right, at the expense of the relationship.
What to do instead: Fight for the relationship, argue for the relationship. One of the most difficult yet wisest things to realize in marriage is that there are times when you can be right or be happy, but not both.
Recruiting – Have you ever recruited friends or family to your side in a conflict? C’mon, now be honest. It’s as normal as it is deadly.
What to do instead: You want to have friends and family who are not on your side and not on your partner’s side, but on the side of the relationship.
Stop dating – It’s just crazy how often couples do this. It’s as if having a couple relationship is the be all and end all goal of dating, and then just as soon as you reach your goal, you stop doing all the things that got you there.
Dumb, huh? And way to easy to do.
What to do instead: Date. Each other. Regularly. Even in the “new economy” there are ways you can go on dates, creatively and inexpensively. In fact, you can check out [http://GreatDatesDoneCheap.com] to discover 300 creative and inexpensive dating ideas.
Brought to you by award-winning syndicated Relationship Columnist Jeffrey Herring.
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