How to Build Up Trust in Your Relationship

Trust is a building block of any relationship, just like communication. Trust means the ‘firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability or strength of someone or something. In the following article we will look at things we can do to build trust in an intimate relationship; however they might also apply to other kinds of relationships.

How does trust develop?

As we can see from the description above, it is obvious that trust does not happen overnight but is something that grows over time. Even though we either trust or do not trust someone or something, the building up of trust is a gradual development. Therefore you can trust someone more or less, as opposed to only totally or not at all. Having said that, the process of trusting someone happens more quickly for some than others. This is dependent on your personality and your ability and preparedness to trust, first in yourself and then in someone else.


Trust comes from a firm belief in the reliability of someone’s word and/or their actions. When, for example, someone arrives for a date with their partner regularly at the agreed time, this can build trust, especially if punctuality is an important value. When we continually deliver the same (or similar) results, we build that trust.

Truth and honesty

Trust is also closely linked to truth and honesty. Building trust goes hand in hand with speaking honestly and openly, sharing personal parts and being truthful, even when unpleasant issues arise. Usually people prefer to know the truth, even if it is not pretty, than to be lied to.


Keeping confidentiality, even when it is not specifically mentioned, can build trust and a strong belief in someone’s personality and reliability. We like to be open with people we can trust and who we know won’t share our intimate details with others.


Similar to reliability we usually need some kind of consistency from our partner to build trust. If they, for example, consistently show us their love by telling us in words or actions, spend regular time with us, give us gifts or write love notes, we create a trust in its continuation. If, for whatever reason, this expression of love suddenly changes or stops altogether, we start to wonder and question the partner as to what is happening.

Keep in mind that good relationships are built on trust. In order to enhance and deepen your relationship trust needs to be nurtured.

Want to know more? Have a look at my blog.

Nathalie Himmelrich is the founder of ‘Reach for the Sky Therapy’ on Sydney’s Northern Beaches and specialises in ‘relationship related issues’. She is working with individuals and couples using techniques ranging from Counselling, Neuro Linguistic Programming to Journey Therapy. She supports clients in their personal growth in a supportive and professional environment.

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